For a full year I struggled with depression. One day I realized I wasn’t positioning my life for God’s grace to take care of me, but rather I was taking it upon myself to fix things, and it never worked. I tried to quit taking anti-depressants twice, but both times it was pretty terrible.
So on this particular day I decided to go home and really give the problem to God. My prayer went from, “O Lord, help me. What must I do?” to, “The grace of God is upon my life.” As I said this, I threw away each individual pill. For the first time I realized that if my depression were to go away, it would have to be a miracle from Him because everything I had done before had brought only temporary relief.
It was scary as I threw away the last pill because I knew that He would either come through or I would be in hell again in a couple of weeks, possibly even worse than before. However, I didn’t fight it this time. It was all on Him.
Each day, I simply remembered that my life was in His hands and that it was ridiculous to believe that He wouldn’t help me. It has been over two months now, and I have not experienced a single symptom of depression. In the past I usually wouldn’t have been able to concentrate, read, do homework, or do anything because of my depression, but today I am known for my joy. All the glory be to God. I’m healed and free!
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