My mom and I had a rocky relationship for the last ten years. She would often make cutting remarks when I tried to share my heart, or she would humiliate me with sharp words so I harbored unforgiveness toward her. Our relationship was marked by small talk and five-minute conversations.
But at Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry [BSSM], I heard God say, “I want you to forgive your mother.” I made a covenant with Him that I was going to reconcile with her over Christmas break.
During the break, we had a spat almost immediately over how I was to thank someone. She criticized my decision-making and treated me like a child. The old feelings of being demeaned by her resurfaced, but I dismissed them. I had decided to keep my heart soft toward her and told my father about wanting to reconcile with her. He agreed to mediate a discussion between us.
The next night, the three of us sat down, and I told her how God had started speaking to me about my lack of compassion for her. I then asked her to forgive me for the bitterness and resentment I had toward her. She stared at me in disbelief. She had no idea I had been holding in such emotions for years and said she’d forgive me.
“Mom, the critical communication and the hurtful word exchanges between us end today once and for all. It ends in 2012,” I said.
As I poured my heart out, explaining how the last ten years of our relationship had felt, her countenance completely changed. She didn’t know as much about my life as she thought she did and started to cry. She apologized sincerely for all the pain she had caused.
After she was done and I forgave her, she came over and hugged me. My dad prayed over us, and I promised my mom that I’d take greater steps to speak with her more so we could build trust. She heartily agreed to do the same.
A noticeable shift occurred in our family after that night. My mom began playing worship music more often, and I’ve had more confidence in taking a spiritual role in my family. My mom and I have continued speaking to each other with kindness, and we are still building trust.